Prevention recently ran an article on the phrases that most divorced people hate hearing. While the site — link here — focused on 10 things in particular, I’d like to pull out four and make special mention since these were the ones that continually cropped up from friends and family after my divorce. Let’s get rolling.
1. I’m jealous. You get to start over.
This came from a family member, who was very close to me. I found it disturbing that he looked at his relationship this way when I held his marriage up as the gold standard to what a marriage should be. Finding out that he was actually jealous of my moment in misery didn’t speak highly for how his relationship was going, and it really made me rethink the way I pictured happy and healthy relationships.
2. I saw him Saturday evening. He didn’t look like he was having a good time.
Substitute “him” with “her” in my case. After my divorce — and even long after I no longer gave a rip — my family would continually update me on how she was doing, slanting it in their own way to make her seem more miserable than she probably was. Their influence started to rub off on me and push me towards those “harmless” Facebook stalking sessions. On a related note, did you know that people only post the best memories and photos on their Facebook feed? Grr!
3. You’re not alone. Half of all marriages end in divorce.
Somehow this one never made me feel eager to find someone new or put the past behind me. You?
4. I never liked him.
I’m fine with you hating my ex now, but then? This one came up frequently, and I never appreciated it because it taught me that my close friends cared too little to step out on a limb for me and risk admonishment to protect me from a horrible person.
Which of these phrases do you hate? Share your experiences in the comments section below.