As an online divorce site, we take a great deal of interest in relationship issues related to divorce one of which is infidelity. Some people think once a cheater always a cheater, but others aren’t so sure. Here are some examples from reddit of actual couples who managed to weather the storm.
1. “My fiance cheated on me. Now before everyone grabs their pitch forks hear me out. People who think that your SO will cheat on you out of no where is a misconception. Normally someone would opt to cheat after a breakdown in the relationship.
“While I don’t condone nor accept cheating no matter the excuse, I can understand how it could have led to it. We had some serious issues that were going unresolved and I was not being a very good boyfriend leading up to it.
“After I caught her cheating we went through a tumultuous breakup that ended very badly. We ended up spending a year apart and seeing other people. After that year past we both found that we were still hopelessly in love with each other and decided to put the past behind us and give it another try. I forgave her for what she did after she came clean about exactly what had happened and for how long. You can only forgive what you know.
“Things are great now and we are going to be getting married this summer.”
2. “My beautiful wife of 10 years cheated on me 2 months into our marriage. It took years for me to truly trust her again, but she fought to earn it back. I always thought there would be a part of me that would be unreachable by her after that; that I could only ever trust her 99% after it happened, there would always be this nagging reminder in the back of my head.
“I was wrong. It’s alot of work and love for both parties, but I trust my wife completely now. She voluntarily gave up alot of the privacy hang-ups she used to have, and I gave up needing to know all the details of her interactions with other guys.”
3. “I knew immediately that I would try to work through it once. I can forgive a drunken mistake once, and I love my husband dearly and we really hadn’t had any other issues. I knew it would be worth attempting to rebuild because he was immediately open about the incident and also openly willing to make changes. Both people have to want for it to work out.
“The first night was rough; I had to sleep beside the man who hurt me so much, while at the same time having no one else to comfort me in my pain. But I knew immediately that if we were to get past this, nobody else could know. I didn’t want to have other people’s judgements weighing in on what was best for us. It would be worth it for all the same reasons it was worth marrying him in the first place.”
Do you think it’s possible to save a relationship after cheating, and if so, is it possible for it to be as strong or stronger than it ever was?[Image via Flickr Creative Commons]